Wednesday, November 9, 2016

The Struggle is Real; Coming to Terms with Presence

I have always been plagued by thoughts.
I've always believed that the ability to think and to make sense of our surroundings, our emotions and ourselves is what propels us to the top of the evolutionary chart. I mean, it is something that sets us apart from other beings in this beautifully complex world, right?

For the most part, I enjoy thinking; I enjoy dissecting my life to the point where I try to make sense out of everything that engulfs me. As soon as something awakens a feeling in me, I stop and think about what it means, whether it's something positive or negative. Letting a feeling just take over without letting my mind be involved happens rarely. But I guess, since I've always been used to thinking, I've never really considered myself as missing out on anything. 

But I've been introduced to the world of Eckhart Tolle recently, and that has all changed.

What this man preaches is, honestly, very simple. But I'm finding it extremely hard to truly put it into action. And that makes perfect sense - I'm trying to make sense, again, out of something that doesn't need to, out of something that simply means to be.

Last weekend we attempted our 9th mountain in Korea, and something struck me while on our hike out. We passed by a temple on the way up, and even though I have seen plenty of temples in Korean (and China) I couldn't help but to stop and wander around for a bit.
You see, here's what happens. After seeing so many of, what I consider to be, the same thing, you can't help but to lose interest. How many times have I heard others, as well as myself say "You've seen one temple, you've seen them all" and totally meaning it? 
But there was something different about this time. Nothing necessarily about the temple stood out; it was beautiful and humble, like most are. But something struck me while wandering around; something that hasn't struck me in a really long time. 

I'm currently living in Asia. Right now. The abundance of temples is something that doesn't exist back home, not like this anyway. And then I pushed the thought out of my mind, and I stopped thinking all together and just was. 

It wasn't easy, you see... sometimes I catch myself thinking of the most insignificant things like my socks not matching my shoes, or the fact that I need to sweep the apartment, or going through countless of unnecessary to-do lists 24/7. I'm so accustomed to thinking that even now I am trying to make sense of this new 'stop thinking' deal. It honestly beats the whole purpose.

But for a couple of minutes I got it. And I had never really felt so peaceful and content. I just observed and I felt without a thought. And I realized that by not thinking, I allowed myself to truly feel what it's like to be a part of this beautifully complex world. We don't have to be looking for meaning, it's already there - you just have to let it happen.

I'm still very unsure of how to truly live my life with this new concept of presence. Even right now, as I understand how unnecessary it is to dwell on it and try to make sense of it, I struggle. I understand what it is. I get it. But it's so difficult. Still, I'd love to be able to live like this more consciously.

I know that I'll never stop thinking. About the future, about what bothers me, about what makes me happy, about what I want, about it all. But I'd like to feel more. I'd like to be more aware of just feeling, of just being.



Wednesday, November 2, 2016

The Korean Mountain Challenge pt 3

Welp, I have learned that Korea is one of those places with really, really hot summers and insanely cold winters with only a brief in-between period of bliss between those two. October was fall, and just when I thought life was beautiful, November came.

I realize I complain a lot about the weather. I need to work on that.

It's only the second of November, and it is cold. And I mean cold as in wear three pairs of socks, let the hot water run so that the steam warms up the house kinda cold. Cold weather I can prepare for, but I wasn't ready... it just came.

But fall... well, fall was lovely, and maybe I'll get to see little flickers of it here and there before we get to full-on-winter-mode. October... well, let's say Fall was lovely with it's colors, and lovely with it's perfect all-you-need-is-a-light-jacket weather. And it was lovely for hikes.

One of my favorite things about living in South Korea is the hiking I've been able to do. I can't really express clearly how much hiking and getting out to a mountain means to me - I never really feel quite as at peace and as accomplished as when I'm up that mountain. It arguably is one of few things that give my life meaning and purpose. Every weekend we were able to get out to a new mountain and make the most of of the weekends. Each of these mountains had its own little quirk and personality, it's own challenge and each offered a beautiful view and escape from the busy, busy, Seoul city. And although I am able to recall each of these hikes clearly as individual adventures, they all had some things in common as well:

* We kept falling behind from the mad crowds of speedy adjumas (old ladies) and ahjussis (old men) all pimped out in their hiking clothes, looking ready to take on the Hillary step on Everest.
* We had the misfortune of not getting out on a single clear day - most of our views were clouded with mist, pollution or a bit of both [sad times but I will not stop until I get that]
*People say hi. People offer food and people have struck up conversation. We have made friends on every single one of those hikes. 

So, in October, there were four mountains I haven't written about yet. Mountains 5 to 8 out of my 10 mountain challenges...

5) Daemosan aka Little Hill Repose 
Height: 293m
Date: 10/08/2016


This was the weekend right after Jirisan and my body was still a bit tattered and tired from that hike. We opted for a smaller mountain, walking distance to my boyfriend's apartment in order to take it a little bit easy. When we started walking, the day was beautiful and it promised to be a clear day. In fact, it really didn't' get cloudy and smoggy until we got to the summit. The whole hike itself took less than two hours. We went at a nice pace with no need of stopping to rest. There were quite a few other hikers around on the way up, but it got quieter on the way down. It has been one of the most relaxing hikes so far. 
Also, this mountain is part of the Seoul Walk... a trail that surrounds Seoul. I really don't know much about it but I have seen signs on random parts of the city telling me that I'm walking on part of the Seoul walk. 



6) Yongmunsan aka Another Lesson on Preparing for a Big Hike
Height: 1005m (did not summit)
Date: 10/15/2016


Yongmunsan is best known for it's temple which offers a temple stay. It is also known for it's incredible 1000 year old Ginko tree. The mountain is about an hour away on the subway, and it actually takes you outside of Seoul city limits, and even the outskirts of Seoul's city limits.


We had originally planned to leave early in order to make the most out of the day and to not be rushing down the mountain late (After Nogodan... I refused to make the same mistake)... but as it turns out, we slept it an extra 30 minutes and we ended up waiting another 30 for the subway. And oh boy... that hour made the difference.
We met a nice man on the subway who was on his way to visit his wive's grave since it was their anniversary. He was also someone who was a Corporal in the Korean Army back in his day. And someone who walked faster than any man his age should. He walked us to the bus stop after getting off the subway which took us to the base of the mountain.
There's a park and museum at the base on the mountain, and the temple is not far from where you start. That was where most of the crowds were - by the tree and by the temple. Once you turned into the mountain trail it got quiet real fast. We saw a monk pass us by - leaping gracefully through the rocks with his arms on his back. We saw him further up ahead sitting on a rock and enjoying the sounds of the mountain and the stream. I learned a lot from that glimpse of the monk on a rock about what I would want my life ideally to be.
You see, I like to hike because of the fact of the being so close to nature. I realize that this is extremely cliche, but it's true. I have also learned to love the sense of achievement that comes after each summit. There is a bit of vanity in it, isn't there? But after seeing the monk I thought about how for him, it probably isn't about making it to the top... it probably just is to find the perfect place to think and be, and nothing more. I have to admit that I'm nowhere near - if I'm hiking up a mountain, I will take in the sights, the smells and the breeze and the silence. I will absolutely take it all in. But I will only slow down when I tire... I will push myself to make it to that summit. There has to be a balance, somewhere, no?

This hike was particularly challenging, not only because of it's height, but because the trail got insanely steep for the last 400m and nothing but rocks. They put on ropes to hold on to on the way up, but the fact that you're dangling off the mountain remains the same. 


As we approached the peak we realized that the summit itself was closed because there is weather station there. There are other peaks you can get to, but we were running out of time (time, time, TIME!!!) and we had already pushed past our turnaround time. We got stopped by a couple who offered us a white, alcoholic drink and mandarins who suggested we shouldn't push it further and to make our way down (once we finished the drinks and the mandarins). We lost them shortly after we started to make our way down. 
The day was very cloudy and smoggy, but this was the first hike where we were able to get a glimpse of our first fall colors of the year! 


7) Yebonsan aka Stepping in the Steep! 
Height: 683m
Date: 10/22/2016


So far this little mountain on the outskirts of Seoul turned out to be the steepest mountain we have hiked as well as the fastest. But also the most crowded. And para gliders!
We prepared a little picnic to enjoy at the top for this one, but the summit ended up being insanely crowded. In fact, throughout the whole hike we kept passing hoards of hikers, mostly older Korean groups who gathered at the top to take a massive group picture. There wasn't a single space available at the top to enjoy. I suppose living in such a large city makes people get used to always being surrounded by people. I usually consider mountains and hiking a way to get away from the crowds of the city, but not in Korea, not in this particular day. It is, I suppose the national pastime. 



8) Geomasan aka A Trail through Halloween Town
Height: 657m
Date: 10/27/2016


This is the latest hike we had done... and possibly the last until we get some decent winter clothing. Most of the trail up this mountain were stairs, but that is its own challenge. We made more friends here... mandarins again, and peanuts! And a puppy at the summit. I have often wondered how my dogs would fair on a hike...
This was quieter that the previous week's hike. It was also way colder and the day kept threatening rain, but it never came. 


We met a nice man at the top who shared his mandarins with us. He told us about how he's taking the 100 mountain challenge - apparently a very popular Korean challenge among the older generation. I know that if staying in Korea for longer than a year was my plan, I would definitely be up for this challenge. 

We will make do with our ten Korean mountains, maybe, hopefully more. But we'll keep taking them on all over the world.

I can't wait.